I'm sure you're more than familiar with the saying, "It takes a village to raise a child." It's an African quote/proverb referring to everyone (including people in other villages) banning together for the welfare of the children to make sure they are safe, fed, nurtured, and taught the lessons they need to survive. It's not just the parents or the household's responsibility. Everyone in the community must play a part for the child to thrive.
I think the same thing holds true, in a way, for adults. Especially women. We thrive when we have a sisterhood. We thrive when we have a tribe or a Girl Gang that has our back. Someone who can say, "Sis, you got lipstick on your teeth." or "Girl, you killed that presentation." or "Or friend, I admire you." Other women who affirm us and who genuinely want us to succeed and be happy.
When you hit your fifties it's more important than ever to know you're not alone navigating this decade. Time out for the competition and cattiness. That's one of the reasons I started the Face of Fifty. To create a place/space where black women in their fifties can be celebrated, encouraged, and empowered. A safe place to go where we are understood and supported. Thank you to all of the magnificent women who have helped this community thrive for the past year! Y'all are amazing!
I spent some time ruminating on the topic of the very first blog post for the Face of Fifty. I wanted it to be inspiring and insightful, while also being funny and fierce. But as the days passed, I realized it should be something more– a plea to women.
As women, especially black women, we often aren't allowed to be who we are fully, completely, without judgement or shame. Well, to hell with that! At this age, we've earned the right to finally be at peace. Peace with our hair, our bodies, our pasts, our minds, our thoughts, our decisions, and our feelings. Embrace who you are fully. You've mothered, cared for, pampered, supported, and put everyone else first for far too long– now it's YOUR turn.
Three questions to ask yourself TODAY:
1. What do I like to do? (Don't consider anyone else.)
2. What is the best thing about me? (Don't name anything about your appearance.)
3. What am I good at? (Don't hold back or try to be humble! Maybe you can't sing but perhaps you're great at math or baking or decorating.)
Now take these answers and consider how you can create more joy and purpose in your daily life. As you enter the next decades, stages, and phases of your life, how can you become happier, healthier, and more at peace? It might involve being alone. It might be scary. It might be uncomfortable. It will definitely require change. But you must do it. We do not have the luxury of time. I implore you to put yourself first, starting TODAY. It's a choice you won't ever regret!
(Photo courtesy: Kampus Productions via Pexels)
Blog for Face of Fifty Magazine